Newlyweds in College

If you have been following my blog for awhile or know me personally, you know that I am married to my husband and also pursuing a bachelors degree in social work then afterwards going for my masters possibly. My husband, Chad is also going to college right now pursuing an Education degree in middle school math and English.  We also are still young, 21 and 22. 

Balancing both full-time school schedules, a marriage, and other activities such as church and work is hard work. It is something that must be constantly worked on every single day in order to make everything flow smoothly. Especially our marriage. 

Some people that have other things going on that are older than us, can't make it work and resort to divorce. But when we married we knew this was not an option, so how do we make it work you ask?

Well as I kind of talked about in the last post we make time for everything. We have a schedule that includes homework, school, work, free time for yourself, and free time for us. Sometimes this also requires waking up earlier or staying up later to do a paper, but we know that if we do this that we will get to hangout together without homework. 

We have a date night once a week. We are hoping we can keep this trend up for life, but with kids later it might not be realistic, but we know that once a month is even nice. Even if its just going out for pizza or bringing a movie home to watch, pretty much just relax and be with each other time. 

We also voice our schedules to each other every day to see if there is extra time for us to do something or not. I know this may seem like a lot, but if Chad is working on homework then why not do the same when I see he is or take some me time if I don't have any homework at the moment. Our schedules always change from day to day so others might only have to do this once a week. 

Pinterest Lover, Sims 3 Player, Secret Dance Routines in the Living Room

The title is just about some of the things I love to do when I have a moment to myself to unwind and do not have mountains of homework to do. I also love to watch HGTV and different shows that Chad says he will never watch (even though I have talked him into it a few times). We all need our own time to ourselves to unwind, to do whatever we want because it helps keeps us sane. I get that, but most people don't or do to a certain extent.. but not when it comes to this... 

Yes the video gaming thing that man crave at some point in their lives. Yes, I am so going there. I have an avid gamer that I live with, not only does he play xbox, but he also built his own computer to play computer games, so hes pretty serious about it. And yes his computer has crashed and he has had a meltdown a time or two lol. And I love watching him play video games when I can. The graphics and colors are awesome on the computer! I can see why he wanted to switch. He also watches gameplays on YouTube. 

I know he accepts my hobbies that I like to do as well, so I should accept his. We give each other time each week to be able to do these hobbies while the other is doing homework, at work, or doing their hobbies. Most girls I have talked to say that playing video games are silly or he's not a man or they do not understand. I say well, how many guys do you know that have a Pinterest account? Not many. Men and women are different, we are all going to like different things. And he could have another hobby that I would not like at all, like going to bars or something like that, so I am glad Chad plays video games and does not have some other habit that I would consider bad. 

But, do not think we do not spend time together either. 

We have a special date night where we hang out just the two of us as well, and push homework and hobbies to the side. We do things we enjoy together that night. If we also have more free time from homework for each other during the week we go for a walk or watch TV together. 

I know I am making it out to sound like we are a perfect couple, but we are not. I am getting there, I also have gotten frustrated at the games because they get in the way of some things. I really would like to have a talk with some of the producers (or whatever they're called) of games. Because in order to be accepting of hobbies, you have to understand them fully. Like, for example, you cannot just quit when you want to with some games... but what if you have to be somewhere else right then? Well, you lose points. Silly! They should have a button called, "my wife is getting mad because we need to be somewhere else." 

So, how do I work around this? I am not going to make him stop, because that will not help matters. But, I will tell him about important times we need to be somewhere and we need to be on time. We also have a media curfew, 11pm everything goes off. Sometimes earlier, but thats the final cut off of the night. 

I know that in the future when we have kids this will change in some way especially the having a lot of free time, but I still think we should have some type of free time every week even if its 30 mins to an hr because its just needed, it helps you unwind from stress. 

sincerely, 

confessions of a gamer's wife

Story of us..

Chad and I met in 2009 technically, but I would like to say I met him before that, or noticed him to say the least! My friend worked with him and when he started working there she texted me and told me to come by and see the new guy, he was totally cute! I made it my job from then on out every now and then to come by and see him. I sometimes would even run by him and say "HEY CHAD!" and run off. I was gutsy to say the least. 

Fast forward to 2009. My friend was moving to another college so I knew I would have no reason to go to the store again or to not be as obvious so I asked her for his number. She gave it to me and I started texting him. We texted on and off for about a week then we decided to go see a movie together. 

We did not do a single thing towards each other that night, not even a hug goodbye. But, I knew he was different because when I got ready to leave he said so when will I talk to you again? I said, that's up to you. He said, okay, I'll text you when I get to my car. And he did. It was sweet!

After that we went out a few more times, and every time he would turn his phone off when we were together, another sweet thing about him that made him seem so different.I knew I wanted to be his girlfriend.

Eventually, I told him how I felt and we began going out as boyfriend and girlfriend in October 2009. He proposed a few months later (next July) at my house as he was getting ready to leave. I said yes. 

We kept this a secret from Chad's parents until we got to college that August. 

After that we stayed engaged during my first year at college at the University and his third year of college and first year at the big University as well. It was hard with school to plan a wedding for me, but it was doable. And dates changed from time to time on what day to plan the next year. The plan was to marry in October at first, but we wanted married housing and we thought it would be easier to get it this housing on campus in summer. So we moved it to June. 

When we finally told Chad's parents, they wanted us to wait till after college. Which now looking back I am so glad we didn't yes I want to respect them, but I know if we had done that we would be only making them happy, not us. We wanted to get married then because we knew we not only wanted to but would also being saving a ton of money in the future after college if we were able to be married and live together. Most marriages end in divorce because of financial problems. I did not want to be in that statistic. I knew if we did this we would be not only happy we would be saving money. 

My mom, was not as upset and found out sooner. She just wanted me to be happy and wanted me to know my responsibility if I did so.

The wedding was in June 2011, and I penny pinched every option as much as I could. I bought my dress for $100, made my invitations, made my bridesmaids wear black dresses they already had, etc. We did not even get a nice honeymoon getaway, we went to the Zoo that weekend. (we had summer classes) And I don't regret that still today. Yes, it was more stressful because I had to research more but in the end I am glad I did and still loved every moment of my wedding. Except, the time... 3pm 90 degree weather! Yeah bad idea!

And we have and we still love each other. We talk about the future and plan for it often because even though money is tight because we are still only 21 and 22 yr old college students we know that right now we are still happy and we will be happy in the future as well because we planned ahead. 

I believe if we can make it through college together with as little money as we have now, we can make it through anything. No, our marriage is not perfect and it does take a lot of work, but I love being with Chad and know we are meant to be!

Sincerely, 

Our Happily Every After

Beyond my years...

I believe that because I am married at a young age I have experienced different things than 21 year olds at my age. Not only do I not go out and party, I do not mind to just sit at home and watch TV, and I have a lot of older friends that I connect to and relate to better. It even happens when I am blog hopping, I connect to older women because other than the kids part we usually have a lot more in common. 

I also actually like school for the most part, I like learning. I could live without the homework part though, but I do know its purpose and understand that its just part of it. I understand there is value in truly learning and that we are not here to gain friends. 

I also believe that my major has made me grow more than others at times. Social Work is not only a hard major, (we all believe that we write so much that we should receive a technical writing minor automatically) but it also is a different mindset than other majors have. We want to help people, and not just any people, we want to help the people that sometimes no one else wants to help. 

Lastly, I think about the future a ton. I know some college students do this in some way, but I go to the extremes so I know how important it is to save money for the later in life. I have never lived in a house throughout my whole life so planning for a big purchase like that is a must for me. Chad and I have drawn up designs on the computer, some what of a blue print type design for our dream house. Since my scholarship offers me a job after school I know the whereabouts of where we might live as well. 

I know all these things are not bad, but because I do things like this and more it is hard to connect at times with people my own age because we are into different things. But I am learning to accept that and be thankful for the friends I have, including bloggers. I also think this is an advantage because I am more mature and ready to network for work. 

sincerely,

thankful now

Why I don't wear makeup

I have always dealt with this constant struggle with my whole image, not just my face from time to time but also my body overall. But, it is no wonder because of the constant messages I see saying that thin is in and makeup is the thing. Don't get me wrong I love makeup and I am not saying it is bad to put on, but what if I do not want to put it on just because? should I be judged differently? should I be judged differently if I decide to put it on another day? the answer should be no to both.

In high school, I always wore a little bit of makeup, mainly eyeliner and powder just something to highlight my eyes and that was it. But after high school, school got really hard and I no longer had the time or the urge to use it. So I didn't. Every now and then I do, but when I  do it itches terribly or bothers my contacts to the point of me rubbing it all off. There is just no point in me using it if it makes me uncomfortable is my thoughts.

But I have been criticized because I do not wear it from time to time. Saying if I would put it on, I would look prettier. And that is the problem I have with makeup.

I wanna wear it just because I wanna wear it and make me feel like I took the extra effort because I don't know just because, not because I have to either. I have tried to stress this to others that makeup is just not my thing, but some do not get it.

Source: freshwithdepth.tumblr.com via Alecia on Pinterest

The things I do for bread

With school going on every day, Monday thru Friday, I am completely exhausted with life! I only have 33 days left until I get a break but with that 4 wk break will also come boredom from not having hardly anything much to do. But anyways, no updates on my scholarship except the fact that if I do get it, it will affect my workstudy and cause me to work less hours at work, yes it sounds great at first but I still think I will get bored at times so I am hoping for a babysitting gig maybe once a week or a few times a month to help keep me not as bored, yet still be able to get homework done and get good grades.


The main reason I am writing is to tell you all what happened last night in my night class, but let's first back up a little bit... a few weeks ago my teacher brought in some Friendship bread with banana in it and it was amazing so I asked her can I please have the recipe? She kind of said no at first, but then brought it in last night... and now I know why she was a little hesitant. She did not only give me the recipe but also a starter, keep in mind I had no idea of the process.


I came home to read the instructions and found out it took 10 days to make it. What?! I aint got time for that! lol. I also found out that the idea and story behind the title Friendship literally means you make some and then this makes starter packs for friends.. excuse me but I do not have much of any friends currently, and none that definitely want to make some banana friendship bread. The majority of my friendships are one sided right now... meaning I do all the work. Don't get me wrong I love all of my friends but we all are very busy right now in our own little worlds, I feel like I am in limbo at times with all of them.


Gladly, I found a link on how to control my bread and make less for friends and more for me.. thank goodness I found a solution to a problem.

Poem

School has been going on for about 3 weeks now and I am already counting the days till Summer break. No, not Christmas, Summer. Yeah, I know it is awhile away for sure, but I am hopefully going to the beach if it all works out, and me and Chad have not been to the beach together so I think that would be nice. 

Anyways, school has been filled with tons of homework and nonstop busyness. It is not hard homework really, just a lot of it. One of my teachers asked to make a poem based on the template we talked about in class, below is my poem and in parenthesis are the reasons why I put those things. I thought this was a good idea for our class really...

I am from Quilts, from Kit Kats and Mountain Dew. 

I am from the old but warm, cozy apartment.

I am from the tree in the backyard, the daisy on my foot.

I am from fudge and big eyes, from Paula and Flynn and Leigh.

I am from the carefree and close nit.

From eat your vegetables and don’t stress.

I am from youth groups and service to others because we all come from the same place.

I’m from small town, bacon and eggs.

From the slide my cousin had when we were little, the time I fought with him over the slide because I really thought it was mine, and the hardworking Papaw that does not stop for nothing.

I am from underneath my mom’s bed, tons of pictures of the special bond we have and coloring pages. Mother and daughter turned best friends, a thing only a few people can relate to. 

(Quilts = I always use to sleep with a raggedy quilt my great grandma had made for my mom, I still have it and claim its the best. Kit Kats = I use to love these as a kid, and still have cravings from time to time, it reminds me of my grandma's house when we were out at her pool. Mountain Dew = nothing can come between me and MD, I know its bad for you, but I cannot help myself, I love it!)

( I grew up in an apartment, it wasn't nice, but it was ours)

( I used to play around a tree in my backyard, and I have a daisy tattoo on my foot in remembrance of a friend.)

(Fudge = family tradition, Big eyes = my mom has pretty blue eyes, that change colors, mine do the same thing, my dad had big eyes, two things I now have and people love to notice about me. From Paula, Flynn, and Leigh = Paula is my mother's name, Flynn is my maiden name, Leigh is my married name.)

(Carefree and close nit = how my family is.)

(From eat your vegetables and don't stress = I was a daycare kid, yes born and raised, I guess that is what helped me a lot as far as being an only child, and these were the things they use to say to me.)

(Youth groups and service to others = I loved church growing up, and still do today. I was big time involved in youth group and loved every moment of it. And service to others means to me helping others as much as possible, the social worker in me.) 

(Small town, Bacon and eggs = I really am from a small town, and bacon and eggs were a tradition between my grandma and I when I was little.)

(Slide = I really did fight my cousin for the slide at his house, because I had one just like it at my house and I thought he had took it, I was so mad I pulled the thing on top of me. Yes, we have it on video. Papaw = a great man that never stops at anything from work to love.) 

(Underneath the bed = where all the memories and pictures from the past are, it really was just me and my mommy for as long as I can remember and we really did become best friends, we were all each other had.)

Sincerely, 

mommy's girl