Friday, April 26, 2013

Worry about nothing. Pray about everything.

I have been going to church my whole life, church has always been very important to me. I went to Sunday school when I was little, went to church camp 2 summers and loved every moment of it. God has always been there for me through everything, especially during college he has always provided what I needed. 

My mom is the main reason I know God and church has been very important to me throughout my life and even though sometimes I did not want to go, she made me go through those times. And I'm glad she did. 

In October 2009 after me and chad started dating I knew things might change, I wanted a man that went to church with me but I knew I could not force him to go if he did not want to but I would always invite him from time to time just to show him it was up to him but if he wanted to come I would not mind. 

I was so glad he eventually decided to come. But nervous at the same time. I went to a pentacostal church and loved everything about it, it was a part of me. But sometimes others that have never experienced something like that do not know what to think because they do not understand it. 

The day he came, let's just say everyone was feeling God's presence in a big way and I was afarid that Chad might freak. But once again God was affecting Chad and I that day and he did not freak nor did he do anything else but sit there. 

I knew right then he was the one for me. He never judges others and is very open to things he might not fully understand. Yes, he did ask questions afterwards about some things but it is expected because he had never experienced something like that before. And even when he asked questions it was respectful the way he asked them. 

He continued to go with me to church and told me that before he used to go to church with his parents when he was little but after a little while they decided to stop going. We hope one day they will start going back again. 

Fast forward to 2010 when we started going to college, which was an hour away from home... I did not see the possibility of being able to go home every weekend to go to church so we began church hunting. 

Most people are not as lucky as we are but the first church we tired was the one we have been going to ever since, We love the people there and the pastor's sermons are amazing but we have hit a few bumps along the way since we have been going.

First bump was in June 2011 when we just got married we were afraid we would not find an apartment that was located near our college because it is very hard to find apartments in a college town and I prayed every single night for a good while that God give us a place because I felt like we belonged in that church. Thankfully we were able to live in campus housing for married students which is a big blessing in itself because not only is it near the church, its on campus so it saves us money for gas as well as it is cheaper than most apartments around town. We also can stay here through masters which is something we might do if we decide to do masters right after bachelors. It was like God knew we needed to stay here because of church.

God has been with me through changing my major, my marriage, my wedding, my scholarship opportunity... everything. I have always asked for God to do whatever he believes is best for me. 

The second bump is a little more recent... 2012. I still kind of struggle with this from time to time. It is finding couples, especially ones that like the same things we do, are able to hangout with us from time to time and have the same values as us. Like I have said in the past, Chad is my best friend so we do a lot of things together. And I believe having couples that you can be friends with is an amazing idea, but also a hard one. We have gotten involved with a couples Sunday school that we love, but I still struggle to have a personal connection with one of those couples or another couple that comes from somewhere else. 

It is something that we pray about and hope God will provide healing or friendships, whatever he wants. I believe it is something I struggle with more than Chad does, and I believe God wants me to grow through this struggle which I am trying to do so. 

Chad and I still have fights and still are not perfect, but we know with God in our marriage we will not fail. We pray to him every night together and I believe this is very important, we also read the bible together and do devotionals together before going to bed, something I hope we can always do together. 


A couple with God in their marriage 

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Newlyweds in College

If you have been following my blog for awhile or know me personally, you know that I am married to my husband and also pursuing a bachelors degree in social work then afterwards going for my masters possibly. My husband, Chad is also going to college right now pursuing an Education degree in middle school math and English.  We also are still young, 21 and 22. 

Balancing both full-time school schedules, a marriage, and other activities such as church and work is hard work. It is something that must be constantly worked on every single day in order to make everything flow smoothly. Especially our marriage. 

Some people that have other things going on that are older than us, can't make it work and resort to divorce. But when we married we knew this was not an option, so how do we make it work you ask?

Well as I kind of talked about in the last post we make time for everything. We have a schedule that includes homework, school, work, free time for yourself, and free time for us. Sometimes this also requires waking up earlier or staying up later to do a paper, but we know that if we do this that we will get to hangout together without homework. 

We have a date night once a week. We are hoping we can keep this trend up for life, but with kids later it might not be realistic, but we know that once a month is even nice. Even if its just going out for pizza or bringing a movie home to watch, pretty much just relax and be with each other time. 

We also voice our schedules to each other every day to see if there is extra time for us to do something or not. I know this may seem like a lot, but if Chad is working on homework then why not do the same when I see he is or take some me time if I don't have any homework at the moment. Our schedules always change from day to day so others might only have to do this once a week. 

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Pinterest Lover, Sims 3 Player, Secret Dance Routines in the Living Room

The title is just about some of the things I love to do when I have a moment to myself to unwind and do not have mountains of homework to do. I also love to watch HGTV and different shows that Chad says he will never watch (even though I have talked him into it a few times). We all need our own time to ourselves to unwind, to do whatever we want because it helps keeps us sane. I get that, but most people don't or do to a certain extent.. but not when it comes to this... 

Yes the video gaming thing that man crave at some point in their lives. Yes, I am so going there. I have an avid gamer that I live with, not only does he play xbox, but he also built his own computer to play computer games, so hes pretty serious about it. And yes his computer has crashed and he has had a meltdown a time or two lol. And I love watching him play video games when I can. The graphics and colors are awesome on the computer! I can see why he wanted to switch. He also watches gameplays on YouTube. 

I know he accepts my hobbies that I like to do as well, so I should accept his. We give each other time each week to be able to do these hobbies while the other is doing homework, at work, or doing their hobbies. Most girls I have talked to say that playing video games are silly or he's not a man or they do not understand. I say well, how many guys do you know that have a Pinterest account? Not many. Men and women are different, we are all going to like different things. And he could have another hobby that I would not like at all, like going to bars or something like that, so I am glad Chad plays video games and does not have some other habit that I would consider bad. 

But, do not think we do not spend time together either. 
We have a special date night where we hang out just the two of us as well, and push homework and hobbies to the side. We do things we enjoy together that night. If we also have more free time from homework for each other during the week we go for a walk or watch TV together. 

I know I am making it out to sound like we are a perfect couple, but we are not. I am getting there, I also have gotten frustrated at the games because they get in the way of some things. I really would like to have a talk with some of the producers (or whatever they're called) of games. Because in order to be accepting of hobbies, you have to understand them fully. Like, for example, you cannot just quit when you want to with some games... but what if you have to be somewhere else right then? Well, you lose points. Silly! They should have a button called, "my wife is getting mad because we need to be somewhere else." 

So, how do I work around this? I am not going to make him stop, because that will not help matters. But, I will tell him about important times we need to be somewhere and we need to be on time. We also have a media curfew, 11pm everything goes off. Sometimes earlier, but thats the final cut off of the night. 

I know that in the future when we have kids this will change in some way especially the having a lot of free time, but I still think we should have some type of free time every week even if its 30 mins to an hr because its just needed, it helps you unwind from stress. 


confessions of a gamer's wife

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Story of us..

Chad and I met in 2009 technically, but I would like to say I met him before that, or noticed him to say the least! My friend worked with him and when he started working there she texted me and told me to come by and see the new guy, he was totally cute! I made it my job from then on out every now and then to come by and see him. I sometimes would even run by him and say "HEY CHAD!" and run off. I was gutsy to say the least. 

Fast forward to 2009. My friend was moving to another college so I knew I would have no reason to go to the store again or to not be as obvious so I asked her for his number. She gave it to me and I started texting him. We texted on and off for about a week then we decided to go see a movie together. 

We did not do a single thing towards each other that night, not even a hug goodbye. But, I knew he was different because when I got ready to leave he said so when will I talk to you again? I said, that's up to you. He said, okay, I'll text you when I get to my car. And he did. It was sweet!

After that we went out a few more times, and every time he would turn his phone off when we were together, another sweet thing about him that made him seem so different.I knew I wanted to be his girlfriend.

Eventually, I told him how I felt and we began going out as boyfriend and girlfriend in October 2009. He proposed a few months later (next July) at my house as he was getting ready to leave. I said yes. 

We kept this a secret from Chad's parents until we got to college that August. 

After that we stayed engaged during my first year at college at the University and his third year of college and first year at the big University as well. It was hard with school to plan a wedding for me, but it was doable. And dates changed from time to time on what day to plan the next year. The plan was to marry in October at first, but we wanted married housing and we thought it would be easier to get it this housing on campus in summer. So we moved it to June. 

When we finally told Chad's parents, they wanted us to wait till after college. Which now looking back I am so glad we didn't yes I want to respect them, but I know if we had done that we would be only making them happy, not us. We wanted to get married then because we knew we not only wanted to but would also being saving a ton of money in the future after college if we were able to be married and live together. Most marriages end in divorce because of financial problems. I did not want to be in that statistic. I knew if we did this we would be not only happy we would be saving money. 

My mom, was not as upset and found out sooner. She just wanted me to be happy and wanted me to know my responsibility if I did so.

The wedding was in June 2011, and I penny pinched every option as much as I could. I bought my dress for $100, made my invitations, made my bridesmaids wear black dresses they already had, etc. We did not even get a nice honeymoon getaway, we went to the Zoo that weekend. (we had summer classes) And I don't regret that still today. Yes, it was more stressful because I had to research more but in the end I am glad I did and still loved every moment of my wedding. Except, the time... 3pm 90 degree weather! Yeah bad idea!

And we have and we still love each other. We talk about the future and plan for it often because even though money is tight because we are still only 21 and 22 yr old college students we know that right now we are still happy and we will be happy in the future as well because we planned ahead. 

I believe if we can make it through college together with as little money as we have now, we can make it through anything. No, our marriage is not perfect and it does take a lot of work, but I love being with Chad and know we are meant to be!


Our Happily Every After